For some reason, I once started singing “Ave Maria” on a crowed elevator and it was interesting to see the reactions. A few smiled but most wanted to exit the elevator as soon as possible. I have also wanted to carry a whoopee cushion onto an elevator and make fart sounds but have never had the nerve to do it. This made me think of other things not to do on an elevator and they include:
1. Don’t Press All the Buttons
Yes, it’s tempting to see what happens when you light up all the buttons, but the result is a series of unnecessary stops that will make you very unpopular with your fellow passengers.
2. Don’t Face the Wrong Way
Facing the back of the elevator, or staring directly at someone, is a surefire way to make everyone uncomfortable. Save the dramatic flair for your theater class.
3. Don’t Have Loud Phone Conversations
No one wants to know about your doctor’s appointment results or hear you argue with your cable provider.
4. Don’t Use It as a Gym
Sure, you might be in a hurry to fit in a quick workout, but an elevator isn’t the place for your morning stretches, yoga poses, or that CrossFit routine.
5. Don’t Ignore Personal Space
Elevators are small, and personal space is a luxury. However, this doesn’t mean you should treat it like a game of human Tetris. Avoid crowding people or leaning on them, even if it means standing in an uncomfortable position.
6. Don’t Make Unnecessary Small Talk
While some light conversation is acceptable, especially if you know the other person, there’s no need to dive into deep, philosophical discussions or ask overly personal questions. Keep it simple: a nod, a smile, and perhaps a comment about the weather will suffice.
7. Don’t Press the Emergency Button for Fun
Emergency buttons are for emergencies. Pressing it out of curiosity or boredom can lead to unnecessary panic and possibly a visit from the fire department.
In conclusion, elevators are a shared space where a little consideration goes a long way. By avoiding these common pitfalls, you can ensure your elevator rides are smooth, pleasant, and free from awkward encounters.
Essays, Art and Plays by Dan 